Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Busted for Charity!

The Reverend Lois Keen has been nominated for arrest!

On Thursday, December 10 at a little before 11:00 a.m., the Muscular Dystrophy Association Posse will drive up to Grace Episcopal Church at the corner of Union Park and Mott Avenue in Norwalk and will arrest the priest, the Reverend Lois Keen for the high crime of "being charitable and having a sense of humor".

Rev. Lois will be held in jail at the Tuscan Oven on Main Avenue, next to the Motor Vehicle Department, until she can raise the bail of $2400.00 to be donated to the Muscular Dystrophy Association. Her mug shot will be taken at the Tuscan Oven and she will be fed the gourmet version of bread and water while being held in a VIP cell.

The MDA has been kind enough to advise Rev. Lois about her impending incarceration so that she can begin NOW raising pledges toward the $2400.00 bail. Meanwhile, her parole officer will contact her to coach her in setting up her own pledge website, and to give her the opportunity of nominating other likely, charitable, good humored suspects for imprisonment. She will then be transferred to the witness protection program, which RevLois is certain is where the person who nominated her for this rap resides!

This is not the first time Rev. Lois Keen has been arrested for the sake of charity. While service at Christ Episcopal Church in Milford, Delaware, Rev. Lois was nominated for arrest on behalf of the St. Jude Hospitals and held at a local auto dealership until her bail was pledged to that worthy children's charity. Rev. Lois admits that while the people at the auto dealership in Delaware were kind and she had a lot of fun, she can't believe her luck in being incarcerated in a VIP cell at the Tuscan Oven. She is coming up in the world of her heinous crimes of charity and good humour.

Now is the time to stand up and be counted as a reader of this blog! RevLois and the Muscular Dystrophy Association need your help. Make your early pledge in the comment section and may God have mercy on your souls!


MadPriest said...

I say "Think big!"

For $4800 they will keep her locked up for another week.

Lois Keen said...

All right! Up that ante and give the congregation a vacation!