End of an addiction?

I've been in mourning since learning my Border's in Wilton was closing, slowly, excruciatingly. Now I find the ones in Stamford and Fairfield, which aren't close but for a book addict could be doable, are also closing. So I did a search of all the Border's stores in Connecticut, and all are closing except Farmington, Meriden and Waterford.

So that's it. I'm not likely to treck weekly to any of those places, especially with the price of petrol. I hate the Barnes and Noble stores. I loved the Border's stores. It's an atmosphere thing I can't describe. So, going to the book store and browsing for new mystery titles among my favorite authors, and then browsing in general, always coming away with something, will no longer be happening.

I'll save money, I guess - I spend over $1,000 dollars a year on books, - but it's hard being forced, cold turkey, into giving up an addiction - buying books, coming home with them in a bag, stacking them up on the floor and reading through the pile one by one. I'ts over.

I can go to the library, but they're not as addicted to murder mysteries as I am. It's slim pickings. I'll have to go every day if I'm to catch the single edition of new titles before someone else snatches them up ahead of me. Not likely, even though the library is just around the corner.

When I was a kid, I loved the library. Border's became my replacement for that library love. I could take a book off the shelf and read the whole thing if I wanted, though I never did. It was a place I could try out a book that had been highly touted and buy it, or not, depending. But I always bought something. Now it's over.

There's some irrational part of me that's outraged that it is Border's that is closing and not Barnes and Noble. "Why MY store instead of that tacky, incomprehensible one?" I cry out. Silly, I know. In the great scheme of things, it's nothing. But it's about not having any control over the things I care about, so I rage, a little, at the cosmos for the loss of this seemingly "nothing" part of my life.

At least I can do this one thing, I can avoid giving my business to Barnes and Noble. Not easy for an addict, but frankly, since the atmosphere of Barnes and Noble does not invite me, I may just be able to keep this resolution.

Rest in Peace, Border's. I'm off to the library.